Alright, bestie, let’s talk about Long Lee x Frank and their latest flop.

sigh First of all, let me just say this: I wanted this to work. I really did. But why, oh why, do they keep giving these two dumpster fire plots? First Love Syndrome (Frank’s cursed wig still haunts me), and now this? Directors, come to the front of the class—I need answers, and I need them now. Anyway, let’s break this down.

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CHARACTERS: CUTE, BUT MAKE IT CRINGE

Let’s start with Frank as Phum (or should I say, “male bimbo extraordinaire”). He’s giving us that rebellious “IDGAF, let me love who I wanna love” energy, and honestly? We stan. Frank plays it well—like, he doesn’t look too awkward pretending to be adorable, but some moments had me full-on secondhand embarrassed. “Sir, how old are you? This ‘uwu’ act expired two birthdays ago.”

And then there’s Patrick, played by Long Lee, aka the hottest bartender in BL history. The man is out here flipping bottles and serving smoldering stares like it’s happy hour. Plus, he’s immune to Phum’s vampire powers because, duh, he’s got a dark past to reveal. MUAHAHA. (Side note: when Long Lee’s on screen, I forget about plot holes, dialogue, everything. He’s THAT hot.)

The side characters? Meh, except Mix, who’s out here carrying the entire series on his back. He’s hilarious, and honestly, without him, this show would be dryer than my inbox after a bad meme.

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THE PLOT: WHAT EVEN IS THIS?

Okay, buckle up, because this story is… A LOT. So, vampires have rules (obviously), and the current generation can’t fall in love because… reasons? Phum, being the rebel icon he is, says, “Screw this!” and escapes to the human world using a ritual book so he can love freely. Girl. What?

The plot could’ve slayed. Imagine Patrick as a vampire hunter trying to sniff out Phum, who’s all, “Oops, I dropped my bloodlust,” while secretly hiding his identity. But noooo, instead, we get Phum vs. the Vampire Government fighting for the right to love. This is giving Twilight fanfic written at 3 a.m. in 2011, and I’m not mad—just disappointed.

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ACTION SCENES: WHERE’S THE PUNCH?

Look, we all know Long Lee’s a Muay Thai king, so when the final showdown popped off, I was ready for art. Instead, we got basic punches and kicks. The whole thing felt like a group project where only one person did the work. I mean, even Love Syndrome (yes, THAT mess) had a snooker fight scene that slayed harder than this. Honestly, they could’ve just let Long Lee choreograph the entire thing himself.

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CHEMISTRY: I’VE SEEN MORE SPARKS IN A MICROWAVE

Let’s be real: Frank and Long Lee are gorgeous humans, but their chemistry? Missing. From episode one, it felt like two coworkers forced to attend a trust fall exercise. (Spoiler: they dropped each other.) Thank the BL gods they’re getting new pairings—Long Lee with Boom, and Frank likely back with Drake. Maybe those ships will finally serve the Starbucks-level chemistry we deserve.

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OST AND FINAL VIBES

The OST? A slow love song for a vampire story? No. Miss ma’am, we needed something edgy and iconic, not a sad ballad that belongs on a “Songs To Cry To” playlist.

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FINAL RATING: A COMEDIC FLOP WITH HOT PEOPLE

In conclusion, Long Lee x Frank deserved better, but this was still… watchable? Barely? The comedy saved it, and Long Lee’s hotness carried me through, but the plot and chemistry were DOA. BL directors, please go read Wattpad for better ideas.

Final score: 7/10. Would I rewatch? Only if someone paid me in Starbucks and therapy.