de Aehsassy & Enny, Outubro 19, 2024
172

Hey pals, we're making a comeback! This time with an absolute genius idea that will resonate with everyone who shares the same amount of sanity with us. Haven't we all wished to have the Green Flag, or in some cases, the Red Flag of dramaland as our weekend date or maybe even lifelong companions (if you can be loyal to one and not simp every second oppa out there, lol)?

So, after surviving the highs and lows of our top and flop dramas, this time around, we're putting our fate in each other's hands by letting each other choose our dream partners. Because when the rom-com turns into a melodrama, we can skip the waterworks and the "I told you so" speeches. Now it's as easy as pointing at our friend and saying, "Well, this one's on you, buddy!" and moving on!

Also, with our drama tastes doing the tango on opposite ends, it's either going to be a masterpiece or a hilarious disaster. Get ready for the romantic comedy you never knew you needed!

˚✧˖° Quick Rundown⊹✧˖°.

1) Picking a Perfect Boyfriend from our watchlist because, let's be real, humans are just too darn delightful. 

2) Forcing the friend to watch those dramas and joining in to worship our perfect partner. 

3) But friends are friends; they might ask you to break out of your delusion because you are simply simping over a pure red flag.

But before that, let's spill the tea on the not-so-glamorous side of our brilliant scheme. As you can see, we don't sleep given that at 2 AM we are still ranting about random things. I doubt you will find any sane judgement throughout this article.

Scroll to the end for a fun game!


๋࣭ ⭑Who is Enny ?๋࣭⭑๋࣭ ⭑
Aehsassy: Enny is a girl my age, and fun fact: she's also doing the same degree as me. In fact,  we once lived in the same city, but we never talk about those things because MDL is our escape heaven and we just want to be dumb here. She hates every drama I recommend to her, which shows how much of a questionable taste she has. Although she has picked all the high-quality green flags, I doubt if she will date any of them because she gives off a bossy vibe, and I can't remember how many times she has told me that romance is cringe-worthy.

「 ✦ Choice no. 1 ✦ 」

↝ Description 
Drama: Hidden Love (2023)
Name: Duan Jia Xu
Profession: Software Engineer
Major Characteristics: Has a flat chest
Why Enny picked him?

I have an older brother in real life, and I call all his friends "Bhaiya" (the Indian term for brother; in India, if you consider someone a brother, you can't be romantically involved with them). So having a childhood romance with one of his friends has been a dream of mine, and if I get to imagine, Duan Jia Xu makes an obvious first choice by being a checklist of green flags. And need I mention his looks?

What Aehsassy has to say?

Okay, first of all, Enny is openly stealing the best green flags; she marked him before I could speak, and yes, that's how he's here, shining on her list. Sir is a major yes from my side; he will teach you, he will feed you, and he's softer than the clouds. Even after coding relentlessly for hours, Sir looks divine, unlike Enny, who looks like a dehydrated ghost. I mean, it's the character we are talking about; ignoring the age difference part of the drama, he's someone who slowly builds up a relationship and gradually names it. If we are chasing him, we have to be patient. Which I guess Enny is not; she will ask him to date; Duan Jia Xu can put her on hold, fearing she might get hurt; and that's where the real game will begin. But hey, if he's the endgame, then Enny is the luckiest girl ever.

 Final words: 100 % boyfriend material.


「 ✦ Choice no. 2✦ 」

↝ Description
Name: Yoo Shi Jin 
Profession: Deals with mafia and presidents. 
Major Characteristics: Loves jumping - from cliffs and windows.
Why Enny picked him?

I am warning everyone to never judge him in my presence because I am defending my man to infinity and beyond for being the very reason I am a part of this cult. I have always been a fangirl of soldiers' wives because being the backbone of a soldier for whom the nation comes before family ain't an easy job. And what better way of being with SJK oppa than stepping in the shoes of my role models and getting to save lives with a man who comes as a combined package of uniform, humor, and cuteness?

What Aehsassy has to say? 

Yes, we can't possibly betray him because he's both of our first male lead in Kdramas. But would I date him? No. Would I pick him for Enny? Also no. Well, he's a very good human, but dating goes beyond that; it also concerns your day-to-day life. In the drama, as far as I remember, they both ended their first connection and were only able to give it a second chance because FL was sent to help ML and his teammates. Strong fate, if you ask me. But for normal girls like us, who have no idea what it is like on the borders, it's quite hard to maintain the long distance. Staying connected is hard, and overall, it's not good for people with fragile mental health like her. But I found him quite funny. Maybe he will be a very good friend, and Enny and him can keep pranking each other, and one day he will say, Oh, you are standing on a mine, and she will faint. He will give her a piggyback ride home, and if she can ignore the fact that it was him who made her faint and only concentrate on "he carried her back home," they can date, but she's definitely paying him back. 

Final words: Friend zoned.

「 ✦ Choice no. 3 ✦ 」

↝ Description

Name: Moon Kang Tae 
Profession: Everyone's fav caretaker.
Major Characteristics: Belongs to Himself
Why Enny picked him?

I simply say that I don't think anyone but him would be the perfect fit for me given the mental health issues I stumble into. He's both charming and caring, and with eyes that can enchant hearts, I am sure he'll seal the deal in less than a nanosecond! I am not really the stalker type, but if it's him, I'll gladly follow him to the ends of the earth.

What Aehsassy has to say? 

Now we're onto something! I was hoping to give Duan Jia Xu the crown of perfect boyfriend for Enny, but you know what? I've had a change of heart – I'll just claim him for myself. Yeah, I'm a bit shallow like that. But fear not, we've got the perfect match right here. This guy can handle all the wild tantrums Enny might throw his way.  I actually dropped this drama but from what I can tell, he was cold. Perfect – Enny needs a bit of the cold shoulder treatment. It might just ignite her curiosity, and who knows, maybe she'll start putting in some effort.
And after seeing how he handles everything with calmness and grace, she will think highly of him. The final deal breaker would be him expressing his true feelings and how he also feels pain and sadness. A sensible guy like him would give Enny a new spectrum to think about and grow on. Also, the place where Enny lives has no deer around, so they will have a peaceful time. I'm sold on him, so let's officially stamp the "approved" label. (And can we talk about how unfairly handsome he is? It's like God went overboard with the beauty serum just to be enchanted by his smile!) 

Final words: Marry him.

๋࣭ ⭑Who is Aehsassy?๋࣭⭑๋࣭ ⭑

Enny: To me, she's like those people you can always rely on to have your back, unless the topic shifts to drama recommendations – then it's a bit of a lost cause. And I must say she indeed is a very loyal person for having stayed true to pestering me for J-dramas while simping over Song Kang in Love Alarm. Fragile as a soap bubble, she practically floats into orbit at the slightest compliment. Apart from being a night owl, she actually has a great sense of humor, which I am not sure all her green flags will be able to put up with. 


「 ✦ Choice no. 1✦ 」

↝ Description
Drama: Animals
Name: Kazao Nagamine

Profession: Paparazzi 
Major Characteristics: Only eats Noodles 

Why Aehsassy picked him?
Umm, is it fine if I say he's too handsome and not picking him would waste this vision given to me by God? I mean, he's harsh, and I need that reality check to survive. I will be in this toxic relationship with him where he will answer my call whenever he wants, and my post-breakup transformation will make him doubt his icy demeanor.

What Enny has to say? 

I don't think Aehsassy has any idea about what a green flag should look like because she dropped the dramas with green flag MLs, hence her visible choices. So straight up, this guy is a big "no" from me, yes, me, who's been in awe of his looks from the first frame and who was dropping any drama that does not give him a happy ending. This man is a moving advertisement for noodles and hasn't ever heard of what we call a healthy diet, so he's dying early, leaving Aehsassy alone. To count as a plus, he has an amazing dressing style and will pick great fits for Aehsassy, so she's going to be slaying in her mourning costume at his funeral if she does not die of the necessary panic attack that it will take to communicate anything with her.

Aehsassy is perfect for him because my girl knows how to boil water to perfection and is the greatest instant noodle chef the world has ever seen, but this guy is not for her!

Final words: Be his health insurance nominee!


「 ✦ Choice no. 2✦ 」

↝ Description

Drama: Healer
Name: Seo Jung Hoo
Profession: Stalking and handing deliveries just like Jeff Bezos.
Major characteristics: Is the best sleeping pillow in the market.
Why Aehsassy picked him?
Do I have to explain? Dating him would be so much fun, like, he's a mysterious guy with tons of cool secrets [yes, I am an adult, lol], and it's just super thrilling to live a life that's not about your daily cafe dates but about being in a borderline forbidden relationship with a man straight out of an action suspense novel. Plus, since he's everywhere, I can feel safe because I have zero sense of personal security. I am accepting all the cookies online as if all the shady sites are my distant relatives offering me sweets. Also, folks, let me spell it out one more time: to make it on my list, you need to check off three crucial boxes – "good looks," "good looks," and, you guessed it, "good looks." And who fits the bill? Yep, him.

What Enny has to say? 

I could never possibly say that oppa is a red flag given my obvious loyalty. Am I okay sharing him with Aehsassy? I am not that shallow, unlike her, so I guess I'll be fine or maybe rest my head on some other oppa's shoulder for solace because friends first and girl code stays.  Also, I am sure the antisocial Aehsassy I know would love a weekend snack at his annex, and the future plans of moving to an island would excite her into another dimension. Since she always gives off vibes similar to those of patients with brain injuries,  I think her childhood romance with a mysterious man will make quite a believable story. And given the clumsy way of life we share, she needs all-time supervision and care, which oppa would gladly provide. All she needs is an emergency medical kit, and the rest will be left for JCW.

Final words: He's your gift from the cosmos!


「 ✦ Choice no. 3✦ 」

↝ Description

Name: Haiba Jin
Profession: Teaching - how to be hot! 
Major characteristics: Cracks lame jokes at graveyards.
Why Aehsassy picked him?

This guy was hilarious in every sense, but that moment when he's serious will make you feel chills. If someone can heal us in this way, I am ready to spill out all my deep-down worries. Stalking is creepy but when he does it; why is it like the cutest thing on the planet? Maybe because he's not doing it for selfish purposes. I will disown Enny if she dares to say something against this guy because he's the best.

What Enny has to say? 

I think Aehsassy is really god-gifted, given her extraordinary talent for ignoring the obvious red flag behaviour of this gorgeous eye candy. I highly doubt she will ever call the police on this handsome stalker. If he buys her a few gifts, she will willingly put up with all the lame jokes for life, but can I blame her when he's this hot?  Also, the blunt, super possessive, dominating, with a pinch of what we call red flag behaviour type of guys don't suit Aehsassy's fragile self, in my opinion. And it's my duty to protect my friend, so I'll just hold him hostage and keep an eye on him the whole day. I believe that would be the right thing to do!

Final words: You run when you see him, in the opposite direction!

PS: I hope the teachers at her school aren't that hot, because I really regret not being her classmate if that's the case.


As the name suggests, we're upping things up by having you all select a dream potion—a drink with magical, therapeutic, or lethal qualities—i.e., drama boyfriend. Each option is explained along with its key features [which might contain spoilers], and selecting it will result in the potion of your choosing. This game is meant to be played for entertainment only; no ridicule of any kind is intended.

˚₊‧ა  Crescent Club - The Red Flags ໒ ‧₊˚

⌞ Choice no. 1⌝

He's mean to you; he's manipulating you, saying he's practically doing you a favour by sticking around; and he's the only one who can handle your mediocrity. But his justification is that he's hopelessly in love with you and will do anything to keep you by his side. Sounds like fanfic, right? But we have one like him right here.

Red Flag: 9.5/10


⌞ Choice no. 2⌝

You meet a cold guy who's not interested in you; he's minding his own business, but somehow you keep crossing ways. Once that lock of affection is opened, he's now taking control of you in every possible way. Don't leave his sight, don't talk to other guys, don't lie to him, and report every single detail of your day, or else he will chase you wherever you are, leaving you powerless in the wake of his imposing presence.

Red Flag: 7.5/10

⌞ Choice no. 3⌝

Meet Mr. Obsession, the guy who wrote the book on clinginess. He coined the classic line, "I'll tail you to the ends of the earth." Imagine having a brief encounter with someone, and now he's claiming you as his possession. He's playing the role of your self-declared protector, kidnapping you with a straight face. Attempt to run this walking melodrama? Easier said than done.

Red Flag: 9/10

⌞ Choice no. 4⌝

Okay, don't click on the potion because I am here telling you a big secret. This guy is your die-hard stalker. He manipulates you into thinking that he's your perfect partner who possesses all the qualities you are looking for, but behind his kind image is a creepy man who is watching your every move, who goes as far as collecting your ice cream stick, and who will do anything for you to fall into his honey trap.

Red Flag: 10/10


⌞ Choice no. 5⌝

It starts like a fairytale; you fall in love first, and the story is one of those poetic novels with a high emphasis on emotions and inner voices. But here's a progression: as the tragedies fall on your happy-going love story, the male lead unlocks the door to his obsession, and now you are a pawn in your own fairytale because he's controlling every move you make. The fact that he loves you stands on top, and everything else is inferior.  

Red Flag: 6.5/10

⌞ Choice no. 6⌝

Here's the hottest player in the town; he's all but what meets the eye; he's the touch you can't resist; he's the secretive type with abandonment issues; he does not know how to communicate, and you would never know how he feels about you, but he'll chase anyone who hurts you to the end of Earth. This ambiguous relationship is a loop you would not want to get out of, nevertheless it offers you too many butterflies.

Red Flag: 9/10

˚₊‧ა Sunbeam Brews  - The Green Flags ໒ ‧₊˚

⌞ Choice no. 1⌝

A sudden arranged marriage and boom now you live with a man who is on a mission to mend all your wounds and drench you in the kindness you truly deserve. He's all about respecting boundaries and treating you like a princess. Sure, he might fumble a bit in the early days of married life, showing some awkwardness and clumsiness, but it's all part of his genuine effort to evolve for your sake. And in any tough situation, count on him to pick you every time.

Green Flag: 10/10
⌞ Choice no. 2⌝

Heard of Green Flag being wrapped in a bad boy costume? Yes, you heard me right; he's a bad boy who is softie just for you. With a personality as loud as his fashion choices, he keeps you guessing if you're making the sane choice by picking him. He's all set to win you over and everyone else around is in total shock at how a rebel like him is acting like a total puppy for you.

Green Flag: 7.5/10


⌞ Choice no. 3⌝

Your life's at its bottom, but worry not; your childhood friend is here for rescue. He's like a personal cheerleader who makes sure you don't trip over life's hurdles. He loves you but never thinks you are his possession, and he finds his solace in your happiness. But when it's his turn, he's not backing out, will chase you in the cutest ways, will read your favourite books with you, and will help you grow both as a person and as an independent individual.

Green Flag: 8.5/10 

⌞ Choice no. 4⌝

He's the courage you need to hold on to your dream; he's the companion on a deserted island; he's the shoes you walk in on a rainy day; he's the shelter when you have none; he's the one person who will show you how valuable you are, how you brighten this world by being you and how much you mean to him. 

He may leave you for you, but he would run to the ends of oceans to find a trace of you. He's all about never giving up on you!

Green Flag: 9.5/10

⌞ Choice no. 5⌝

It starts with bickering, and you are sure that this "super genius guy who seems to have the ultimate fun while making fun of me" is not going to be your friend, let alone boyfriend, but as you tackle various hurdles like academic stress, you realise that not only he's kind but also allows you to see your full potential. Get ready for an adorable boyfriend who, even though he can be a bit mischievous, won't let his own problems mess with your happiness.

Green Flag: 8.5/10

⌞ Choice no. 6⌝

An AI love story that gives you butterflies for real, this reel-to-reality version of childhood romance has a lot of devoted green flags. He will do his best to juggle between his work and love, but worry not, he's worth the swooning over. He's not the richest of all, but he's dedicated, hardworking, possesses extraordinary gaming skills, and is sizzling hot. Be ready to fall for his deep ocean eyes and charismatic smile.

Green Flag: 8/10

.⊹ ݁ ˖For more, click on the poster below. ݁ ⊹ ࣪ ˖

・₊✧  Conclusion・₊✧

We hope this informative article has left you with a lot of food for thought, and we suddenly look like fairies from heaven who have given you courage to share your deepest secrets, like simping over red flags or being the main character in a hot and sizzling romance novel. We regret to inform you that now is the time to face the butterfly-lacking real world, or maybe you can go simp over fictional men like there's no tomorrow, but either way, it's time for us to bid goodbye. We hope to have not offended any soul, which is much of an impossible task given us and our not-so-apologetic humor, but we did not mean to. However, you may find us lurking around the feeds, possibly going nuts about a man who doesn't even know about our existence, but the beauty of it lies in being proud of it!


Credits: We do not own any of the images/gifs except the screenshots of our conversation;  All gifs/images/stickers are linked to their sources or taken from MDL. Link to the red potion gif is here; link to the green potion gif is here. The link to the picture used in the poster is here. 


Edited by: devitto (1st editor)


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