Love in the Big City (2024)

When Love Lingers in His Touch

To start it off, Love was, in fact, NOT in the Big City of Seoul.
Just kidding. It was indeed found in yourself.


Cliche as it may sound, the series really tackles and hits you with the reality of how queer people survive in a place that lacks the progress of LGBTQ+ awareness. It isn't just the portrayal of Go Yeong's journey through finding love; it's the representation it has shown that many could relate to. I might not want to watch this again, for seeing Go Yeong's journey made me reflect about the definition of love. It hurts, it really does, and no matter how much you want to avoid it, there is no escape from the pain that love could put you through.

Expectations, in many cases, would always yield the result you wouldn't want to face the most. It is painful, and with that pain, can you really ensure you are able to heal from it? Will the trauma of past loves come haunting on you, creeping on you with guilt and consequences you don't even want to face? It's hard to be in love and even when you are in love, there are doubts, there are uncertainties, there are numb days, monotonous days that would repeat over and over until you want it to end. Is it the end though? When you don't feel the warmness of your partner for how long, can you even consider it love? When arguments begins to rekindle and the scenario replays again and again, only for it to be left unresolved and unspoken? Is that love? Would you want to experience that kind of love?

In the end, you would only find the bits and pieces of the emotions you have felt throughout your relationship. The good things would want you to keep coming back for more, even from other people. You drown in the negative side of love, only for it to haunt you back when you least expect it to. His touch, the pleasure, the sweetness you always crave—is it worth it? For you to lose yourself, only to always find yourself running away from the truth. The truth that you may not even want to face the truth that you might be the problem.

Yourself becomes the problem, and even you don't want to accept that. Unless you face the biggest enemy, that is when you could truly say you are free. You accept that sometimes love is not about the pleasures of it, the happiness you get from it, but rather you understanding yourself. When the lingering taste of love comes back to you, you have to face it that it will always linger and, most of the time, it is impossible for it to comeback.

Learn to love yourself, and then, just then, you might be able to love someone else.

PS: I left a very important detail so that readers wouldn't be spoiled.

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Go Young's Tragic Autobiography

The best way to describe this show is snapshots of our main character Go Young's (Nam Yoonsu) life. We first meet him in college, where his queerness makes him a loner. This doesn't stop his pursuit of love, but not all romantic encounters are created equal. Go Young finds again and again that love requires not just the right person, but also the right circumstances. In his quest to figure out what love looks like and how to make relationships work, we see him continue to get his heart broken, both by his own faults and his partners'.

I think what really sold me on this show was the way it was done. It felt like it was being told as if Go Young had written his own autobiography, where he emphasized what he found important and left out the details that seemed too mundane. We get glimpses into his life and his relationships, without ever getting to see his day-to-day life. What happens in an episode may be a few weeks or a year, depending on how important the events felt to Go Young himself. Each relationship he enters presents new challenges, and unable to navigate them, Go Young continues to feel tired and alone. I did not expect such depth of issues on queerness coming from a Kdrama, and it was done beautifully. The issues were never taken lightly or laughed at, and the relationships were portrayed in such a realistic way that it truly felt like this could be someone's autobiography. It was unfortunately sadder than I had anticipated, and the realism just emphasized the tragedy, but it was beautiful nonetheless.

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Chasing the thrill, hoping for love, self-sabotaging

Two episodes in I wasn’t sure if I could share everyone’s excitement about this series. I’ve seen people talking about it as this great breakthrough, a masterpiece, a game changer, and while I acknowledged how having a mainstream actor play a gay character and having actual national funding for a BL show was changing the landscape for kdramas. However, from a perspective of just a regular viewer, who ultimately expects to experience a good piece of televised fiction, I wasn’t really convinced.

Sure, the drama was well-produced, the acting was solid, I couldn’t really complain much about the story progression, as it felt pretty unforced. And yet, I couldn’t really resonate emotionally with the characters. Being it Go Young or his female friend Choi Mi Ae. I attributed it to the style of the story and the manner it was told. Time jumps, skipping important moments when people develop connections, not witnessing how they get closer or grow apart – it all made it difficult for me to develop an emotional connection with the characters as well.

It all changed around episode 3 or 4, e.i. during No Yeong Su and Go Young’s dating era. Their final encounter, during which Go Young ends up punching his (then already an ex) boyfriend was the turning point for me, the moment when I actually felt something (before I did tear up a bit when Go Young and Mi Ae reconnected, but this scene in the restaurant hit me waaay stronger). The look on Yeong Su’s face expressing both self-disdain and resignation really got me. Since then, I’d become more and more invested within every episode, getting used to the report-like narration and time jumps that stopped hindering my ability to immerse myself within a story and became just another tool to highlight its realism. From that moment onward, I did feel like I was given glimpses into different stages of Go Young’s life.

I loved the development of Go Young’s relationship with his mom and her gradual, quiet acceptance of his sexual orientation towards the end of her life. I started understanding Go Young more, noticing how he craves for love, but self-sabotages himself at the same time. That was a big theme for me in this drama, that’s how I saw it. Go Young is chasing love, but at the same time is not allowing it to happen. Affected by having to live with “Kyle”, being cheated on by a boyfriend who gave it to him, and a traumatising childhood experience of his father leading a double life all rendered him wanting love, but not really believing he deserves it.

Nam Gyu is too boring and clingy, so Go Young discards him in a pretty brutal, emotionless way. Then he gets himself entangled in a toxic relation with Yeong Su – a guy who pretty quickly starts to look like a red flag. Go Young clings to him almost in a similar manner like Nam Gyu clung to him before. Why? Partially probably because he was clearly very physically attracted to the guy and Yeong Su had a way to make a person feel like crap, just to throw them a bone from time to time, in order to keep them invested. But my take on it is that, because Yeong Su was never truly attainable, Go Young would end up trying harder. If Yeong Su actually got invested in their relationship 100% and dealt with his internalized homophobia, I’d wager Go Young would probably want out.

Finally, he meets Gyu Ho – probably the strongest candidate for a life-long partner. And yet he lets him go, despite two of them somehow managing to stay together, dealing with the challenges of every day life, its mundane aspects and gradual boredom that sets in their relationship. The relationship with Gyu Ho, while exposing Go Young’s somewhat immature idea of what love should be (a constant source of excitement), was still – in the end – the most mature one. Go Young and Gyu Ho try to resolve their issues, they attempt the rekindle the spark by going to Bangkok, and both work hard on studying Chinese in hope of moving to Shanghai together. And yet, in the end, Go Young sends Gyu Ho off alone, with a “blessing” to date other people. Once again sabotaging his chance for true love.

He doesn’t realize his mistake only until much later. But if they had a chance to have another go at their relationship, I’m not sure if he'd approach it differently. What happens after Gyo Ho’s departure, the ending to a "Habibi arch", the symbolic moving to a new place (as opposed to living in Mi Ae’s old apartment – which was highlighted in Go Young’s dream in one of the earlier episodes as mirroring him being stuck in life, with no clear direction) gives some hope, I suppose?

What originally started as a story of Seoul party goers who don’t always make the most responsible life decisions, eventually turned into quite a deep portrayal of a scarred individual, who tries to navigate his life amidst all the challenges it throws at him. I ended up really enjoying the experience and can understand why this show got so much hype.

There is so much more to say about this drama and more layers to uncover, whether it's Mi Ae's 180 turn in her life attitude not long after getting an abortion, Yeong Su's extreme way of dealing with his sexuality, or Go Young's self-destructive behaviour after receiving gifts from his father. It definitely is one of these shows that leave an audience with a lot of "food for brain". To me, personally, next to The On1y One, it's the best BL drama I've watched (I'm aware not everyone considers it a BL) and also one of the best kdramas.

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The Brilliance Of This Series Is Its Omnitude

This is a rare gem that tells such an aggregate story in an uninhibited way. Not from a BL slant but from a gay man’s perspective. It is refreshingly honest, touching, and one of the most contemplatively deep series I have ever seen. The title is a bit of a misnomer to me, however. So much more than romantic love is explored in this series. It goes beyond classical definitions and allows us to see affection, devotion, attachments, friendships, and yes passion and intimacy as well with gradations within those feelings as well, all within its location of a big city only as an afterthought. It is one of the most powerful dramas of this year.

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Gorgeous! Real! Perfectly imperfect! Loved it!!!

One of the best shows (if not the best) I have watched in years! I loved every bit of it. I’s very real, honest and human. The cinematography is astonishingly beautiful. The characters are perfectly imperfect, deep and down to earth. The acting is superb - there was not even one supporting actor in the whole series who couldn’t act. Kudos to the casting director.
Nam Yoon-su portraits Gu Young in the best way possible, showing his character development and his imperfections very realistically and authentic. He deserves all the praise for his acting and for his bravery to accept this role. The rest of the main cast did an outstanding job, too! Every character was played with sincerity and I could easily imagine them existing in the real world.
The book is amazing and the series does the book complete justice, even though the Gu Young from the series is a tiny bit different from the one in the book. If you read the book, you will understand the series a little better, but the series can stand on its own.

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BEST KDRAMA OF ALL TIME

From the beginning until the end, I was amused and amazed in this series.

There were no dull moments in every episodes. The story portrays a life of a gay man living with HIV who actually seeks a genuine and eternal Love at the end. My empathy in this series is very high. Mostly those scenes I experienced it like trusting other people so much, guillable in love, loving someone who is already married and many more flashbacks in my life after I watch this Kdrama.

I hope this will be the eye opener to end the stigma of HIV, proper communication in a relationship, and just reciprocating receiving LOVE.

I love this series, the story, the cast, everything is a masterpiece. The best. This must be the best KDRAMA I'D EVER WATCHED! Rewatch worthy!!! Hoping for a continuation of the love story of Gyu Ho and Go Young.

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I will never move on from this movie!!!!!!!

This is one of those movies that just gets you. It’s all about Go Yeong, a gay guy trying to deal with love, family drama, and the pressure to fit in. His roommate, Mi Ae, a straight woman, is the one who kinda shows us what’s going on in his life, and it’s a ride full of emotions, awkward moments, and real-life struggles.

Go Yeong’s love life? It’s complicated, to say the least. He’s got a mom who just can’t accept who he is, which causes a lot of tension. Then, when he finally meets Gyu Ho—a guy who seems like pure love, something real—he has to let him go. And that’s the part that hits hard. You can see how much it tears him apart, but he doesn’t have much of a choice. It’s one of those moments where love just doesn’t work out the way you want it to, and man, you feel it.

After Gyu Ho is gone, Go Yeong ends up following some random dude to Thailand for a monsoon vacation, like he’s trying to run away from everything. While he’s there, he’s constantly looking back at the good times, the love he lost, and just everything that didn’t go right. But even though he’s reminiscing about the past, he starts to grow. By the end of it, he’s a different person—stronger, more in tune with himself, and kinda accepting the fact that life doesn’t always go the way you plan.

This movie doesn’t sugarcoat anything. It’s real, emotional, and shows the messiness of love and life. It’s not just about finding the perfect love, but about learning to deal with heartbreak, tough family relationships, and figuring out who you are along the way. It’s the kind of movie that sticks with you long after, making you feel all the highs and lows right alongside Go Yeong.

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